Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you NOT to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us, it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Friday, March 9, 2012

Teach as you would be Taught; Learn as you would have others Learn from you

Do you remember what it was like to be young? To sit in school and listen to the teacher talk? You had your good days and your bad days. The days when everything went in one ear and out the other and then the days that what the teacher said filled your mind with wonder...
Sometimes it even still happens. Shocker.
Here's the purpose.
My success level the past several months has been approximately 1%. Everything I have tried out for since April has come back as a "Thanks but no thanks." And it hurts. The first time was the worst blow (which makes sense because it was the most important thing in my life, at the time, and I had worked the longest/hardest for it) and then there were smaller things that came after, but every time it came with a no. Can I tell you something you probably already know? NOs get harder and harder to hear after a while. You think it would get easier... but it doesn't.
So I have this good friend and some other not as good friends who suggested that I audition for this summer workshop called ReMix Vocal Academy. (As an aside: my voice is not the best. Sure, I can hum a tune, but as far as the serenity and purity... the tinkling sweet musicality of my vocal chords... not so much. It's not fingernails against a chalkboard though... just to be clear.) After some ponderage, I figured, "What the hey. I'll support my friendly acquaintances and audition. What's one more "no" to my repertoire? So I ended up picking a totally random song (Like a Prayer by Madonna? What?) and sent in... a jpg. Ha ha... oops. And it wasn't a good-looking jpg either. My mouth was wide open, chin pushed back-nearing double chinness, my hair is flying (I was in the midst of a rotation). See here:
Awkward, right?

Yeah, I know.

So at the time when I got an email back saying, (in more polite terms) "We cannot look at your audition video because you sent us a picture, genius."
At first, I just laughed at it. Because only I could do something like that. A little bit later, I saw my good friend and we talked about how I had auditioned. She knew about the jpg. And then my mind went, 'Uh oh. If she knows about the picture, then that means that....' Two people I very much respect for their talent had had a good laugh over my idiocy. Part A) I'm glad that I could be of use as comic relief. Part B) EMBARRASSING!!! And all of a sudden I was feeling like a total loser extraordinaire. Never fear, Good Friend talked me down out of my tree and after some thoughtfulness, I realized it's always better to laugh at yourself than to feel foolish about a silly thing like that. That being said, when you send in an audition for anything(!) make sure that it's a video and not an awkward, non-flattering picture.

That was my learning experience.

Now for my teaching experience.

I teach every Thursday for two and a half hours in the evenings. It has quickly become a bright spot in my week. These girls that I teach are angelic little devils, but weren't we all at that age? So yesterday I sat down with the senior company and we had a good chat about why they danced. We then talked about what dance is and how our motivation effects how we do. And after this good, deep discussion, I challenged them. "Always be genuine in everything you do."
Everything I teach those girls, is something that I wish that I had learned at their age so that I could have used it more as I transitioned. It is important to share the things, that we find important, with others, especially with those who look up to us. So maybe I don't have the best technique, but I can teach those girls some very important things that will, if utilized, change their lives forever.

Moral to all of this? A) Always be genuine in EVERYTHING you do. Don't take a second for granted. B) Be a good learner. Listen to the things that other people tell you. You don't have to use them all, but the truth is, your 'teacher' might have a greater insight on a specific situation than you. And C) Teach keeping yourself in mind as a student. Think about what you have learned and what has been most valuable to you. What do you wish you would have known five years before you actually learned it? Share your light, your energy, your passion. That is what makes a good teacher.

Monday, February 20, 2012

What's a Holiday?

So what with today being the last day off in the entire winter semester, it has provoked some thoughts. Strange, I know.

Why doesn't BYU have a spring break?
I'm sure this is a question that many people have asked over the years. Is it a torture mechanism that BYU employs? Perhaps it is an effort to prevent the regular shenanigans that happen (you know, the ones that you see in those CSI tv shows where someone always ends up dead?)
CSI Miami: "Spring Break"
Here are my thoughts on spring break. Dearest BYU, before you allowed me to be called a student, you required me to sign this document that said "Honor Code" at the top. This Honor Code specified several things that I should not do, if I wanted to remain a student at BYU.
So, Honor Code, here's what I think. I think you should trust your students to do what they promised (on paper, I might add) that they would/wouldn't do (as the case may be). It's fair to your students to give us the week-long break that every other student in the world gets. We need mental rest just like everyone else. Going to a religious school doesn't make us immortal. In addition to all that, it's dark and it's cold. So please please please (!) consider having mercy on us poor, mentally depleted students and give us a nice siesta in mid-March

Sincerely,
a student who knows,
Christina



Monday, February 13, 2012

Lucky


It's funny how I completely forgot all about this part of my life until my mother pulled a cd of pictures out that a friend in the ward had given her. Thank you Sis. Peterson for giving me photos so that I will always remember how lucky I was.

I've said it more than once that I have never been lucky with the men. But I was once, though not in the way you'd imagine initially. This is Rusty. He was my buddy growing up for years. He would walk me home from church and endure my silly childish pranks and he was my friend. Truly that's about all I remember about him. Except that he had ticklish elbows... doubtful.

One day he decided to go off and get himself married. I'm pretty sure I was devastated, but he invited me to the wedding and I got to meet her and tell her that if he was ever bad, she could tickle his elbows and he would behave.

I haven't seen or heard from Rusty in a very long time which is as it should be, but the memory of his kindness to a young girl who had absolutely no self esteem will live on with me for the rest of my life. It just goes to show that it's the little things you do that have the biggest impact on the lives of those you touch.
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Monday, February 6, 2012

Also.

Do you even know how hard it is to find a proper-looking head shot that doesn't make you look like your nose is too big or that your eyes are too small or that you're some kind of elf or a demon from the underworld?

....................................................................................................

Never mind that. It's impossible.

Double-sided photo printing, an insulting compliment, an obsession with music and a day of nerves...

So today is a rather intense day as far as days go. I probably didn't get enough sleep last night. Probably.

The greater part of my day has been taken up with discovering the many companies that do NOT print double sided. You can imagine my distress when Walmart said that they didn't! After checking at three or four more places after that, I spoke with a friend and she said, "Christina, print it at home!"
I suppose it would be good of me to explain. Tonight I have an audition. My first for a play, unless you count sixth grade when I auditioned for Romeo and Juliet and probably only got the part because I had a British accent (applause for my dear Papa). But the elementary aside, I am considerably nervous to display my voice for judges.
I do not have an astonishing voice. I know that. But what I do have is perfect pitch. So despite how I sound, I will always be on key. That is a bonus, is it not?
Back to my morning...
So after a few trial and errors, I finally got it to print at work. Huzzah for work! Onward.
On my way to work, I ran into an old friend. He flagged me down to say hello and ask how I was doing and then he said to me (drumroll) "Wow, you're looking really good, now that you're not doing folk dance anymore."
...
At the time I didn't stop to think about it and I came back with a witty joke about how everyone on BYU Campus is either in the exercise clothes or all dressed up saying, "I'm a BYU business major!"

The winning team, consisting of Amie Isom, Chris Huntington, Ryan White and Steven Hall, with Andrea Thomas, senior vice president of Corporate Affairs Sustainability, and Gary Severson, senior vice president and general merchandise manager at Walmart.

 But after a few minutes of walking, I thought... wait a minute. Okay. So I wasn't always gorgeous when I was dancing....


But I sure gave it my all! Poor kid probably didn't even realize what he said. :)

I've gotten into this bad habit of putting my life to a song.

Yesterday it was: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhO6zGh7VD4

A few days ago it was: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AWRHBHDVlQ

Last week it was: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4m_xxjCoXw&feature=related

A week and a half ago it as: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRXlyoVlWTs. Don't tell me those boys aren't adorable. :) This has nothing to do with my life, I just like it.

And today? It changes hour by hour. Ha! This'll do though: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AmTg0cSMF98

So... I should tell you that Rachel Platten is a new discovery of mine and she is AWESOME! Check her out.

Wish me luck and perhaps I'll tell you what my song is tomorrow. ;)





Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Things to think about

1. Studying Don Q in Humanities brings up strange emotions inside of me. Super emotional emotions... right.

2. I get upset when people take more than their half of the lane. I'm like, "Seriously! Here I am, practically swimming under the lane lines while you're jaunting down the center! Do you even know what sharing is?"

3. Swimming makes me verrrrry tired. I'm in bed between 9:30 and 10 every night.

4. I am currently obsessed with chips. Sun chips mostly.

5. While driving one of the service vehicles on campus, I feel superior to most human beings... and then it stops.

6. Wheat Thins have become my way to survive my classes.

7. Painting little white strips across the top of my nail makes my nails curiously beautiful and I find that I like to admire them during class while teachers are lecturing. Oops.

8. Secondly. I still don't like nail polish.

9. Without fail, ABC's Castle always makes me smile.


10. I miss my friends. 

11. I really love my sisters. 

12. Chocolate is a gift from Heaven (but I already knew that, like, 100 times over)

13. Who names their company "Cackle Fresh Egg Farms"?

14. Kindle Fire? Awesome.


15. Toasted tuna for lunch on Sundays (excepting Fast Sunday, of course) is a tradition that I miss. :(

16. Lark Rise to Candleford is HILARIOUS! It doesn't matter who you are or what genre you prefer, it will make you laugh. 


17. Geography is one of the greatest things to study! If you haven't taken a class, you should!

18. I never play Words With Friends with friends. Only with my family. Odd.

19. If my father weren't LDS, he would probably be a preacher. 

20. That's enough.

21. One more... Books. Can't get enough of books.

Now I'm done.

Friday, January 13, 2012

If you can, I seriously recommend it...

Here's the dealio.

Starting this last Monday, I have been exercising consistently every day. The thing that makes this different and special and easier to keep up is that I'm swimming! It's so much easier on my body. I don't feel like my legs are going to fall off or that my knees are going to break, or that I'm going to roll an ankle. It's just nice.

Yes. 6:30 am is early. And yes, that means that I get up at about 5:45 to get ready and pull everything together for the day, but seriously, folks, it's worth it. No joke. I have been feeling so good this week! I'm awake and warm when I get out of the pool and  I get ready and eat a bit of breakfast before my first class at 8.

It's my first week and I'm so tired today. I can tell that I've been doing extra stuff that is taxing on my body, but it will get easier and I will get better and faster and more athletic and buff and skinny... those are all good things, right? Right! I'm not saying that I'm gonna be the next female Michael Phelps because that is SO not going to happen. I'm definitely one of the slowest in the pool, maybe even counting the cute old folks doing their water aerobics, but I feel good about myself and that's all that matters, true?

So what are you saying, Christina? I'm saying, come swim with me! It makes a world of difference despite how early it is! I'm happeeeeeeeeeeeeeey! (Okay, so there's no 'e' in happy, but you get my point)

Peace out, enjoy your weekend.

 

But honestly, check out that muscle definition! :)