So it looks like this is going to be a thing with me... once a year catching up. I'm not too sure that any of it really matters a whole lot anyway but... just in case.
My year of firsts:
First time to Disneyworld and Universal (ie Harry Potter World!)
First time being a mom for a whole weekend
First time holding my day-old niece
First time 100% doing my own taxes (adulting is the worst)
First time going to a palm reader (palm was not read...)
First time seeing Sound of Music IN THEATERS!
First time to Kirtland (SMILE Zion's Camp!)
First time moving away from Virginia
First time living in Washington state
First time hiking in the Columbia River Gorge (lots of waterfalls)
First time buying a car! (first time registering said car-- so much moneys)
First time driving in Portland (save me!)
First time going to the temple alone
First time eating at Voodoo Donuts (once is kinda enough)
First time teaching dance outside of Utah
First temple sealing (Caitlin and Joshua! WOOT!)
First time being main planner of a road trip (Mindy being the co-planner)
First time to Vegas without family (MINDY!)
First time to see BIGBANG (aka 1st time to have physical proof why Daesung & I were meant to be) (MINDY!)
First time MEETING BIGBANG (Does holding hands count?) (MINDY!)
First time shadowing a physical therapist
First time doing aerial yoga
First time to the ballet (Chinese Shenyun to be precise)
It's been almost a year to the day since I last bestowed my verbal wit upon this blog [insert laughter here] and I can clearly recall where I was last January. I was sitting at my desk at Habitat for Humanity SHR, on break, when the urge struck and so off I went. Well, today, I am sitting at my desk in my room in Washington state. Way way across the country. The move from Virginia to Washington happened in May of last year. Well, actually, I was in Utah for a while, but then I came to Washington. And what do I have to say about it all? Washington is absolutely beautiful. It's green and the sky is huge and mostly cloudy. It rains a good deal but I was expecting it and the rain never bothered me anyway. ;) I miss the people in Virginia. I miss the branch. Caitlin, Kim, Emily... I miss you girls. I miss the neighborhood, I miss the Gardens. I miss the DC temple. I won't list off the things I don't miss; it's obviously not important.
Washington doesn't have a Caitlin or a Kim. Or Jackie or Missy or Katie or Mindy. I do have an Emily... luckily for me, one of my old BYU roommates lives in the same town that I do! Just a 15ish minute drive away. We have our weekly Tuesday night hangout where we watch our favorite shows together (Castle, Quantico, etc) and bring each other up to speed on the happenings. (Usually it's me telling her some story about the singles ward.) I teach dance at a studio about 10 minutes away and I enjoy it. It's not a lot of hours but the pay is great and the work is fun. I also take aerial yoga once a week (wish it was more). Aerial yoga is a fantastic workout and it's easy on my bones. I love it.
I'm still with my cute little babies (two of them - the two most adorable little girls in the whole wide world) and I love it more than I ever have. Maybe because it's harder than it was before, when there was just one, but it's so fulfilling. Granted, I think they're blessing me more than I'm helping them, but I do the best that I can. G is 2 and she certainly knows it. It meaning everything. She is so intelligent and crazy stubborn. She keeps me on my toes and I worry already that she's smarter than I am. She speaks in clear, full, complete sentences. This morning at breakfast, she announced to me that her little sister was "trying to grab her aquaphor." L is almost a year old. I can't believe that. It seems like it was only yesterday that I was driving to the hospital to see her for the first time. But it's true. The little chunk of love is 11 months next week. She is so expressive and adorable. When she wants to snuggle it's just the best thing in the world. Being able to spend so much time with these two... it makes me stop and think just how very lucky I am. This is a time that I won't be able to experience in the same way again and I am counting my blessings every minute of the day.
It's been nearly two years since I graduated from BYU. It's flown by. And I have spent that two years trying to figure out what exactly it is that I should be... want to be doing with my life. And, if you've kept up with me, you'll know, there's never been an answer. Not one single answer anyway. Like Heavenly Father has sort of stepped back and said, "You'll do the right thing- whatever it is." I've prayed, I've gone to the temple, I've fasted, I've agonized and cried and felt anxiety and depression over and over again, trying to figure it out. All the advice I've received has been good and was usually along these lines: "Just pick something. The world is your oyster. You can do ANYTHING. You just have to do something." While it is all true, it's not very helpful. Just letting you know. After many discussions with my sister, a thousand more prayers, I went to the temple, determined that I would have some sense of direction upon departure. I was sitting in the Celestial Room after a rather rough session, feeling confused and a little frustrated. So I poured out my soul to Heavenly Father, as I have done over and over and over and over again. When I'd laid it all out before him, something seemed to click in my mind and I said this, "Heavenly Father, I'm going to choose this path. I still don't know if it's the right thing but I'm going to head this way. If it's wrong, STOP ME." The path is physical therapy.
I spent a lot of time in the athletic training room at BYU with Ron Nuttall (one of the best men that I've ever known and a personal hero) and I think it was then that I developed some sort of interest. The truth is that I've always been interested in how the human body works, particularly as it relates to injuries. That comes with being a dancer. And I've always been drawn to help those who had injuries, curious as to how it happened, what steps they'd taken to care for it, etc. I looked into the athletic training program at BYU but for numerous reasons, it just didn't happen. So here I am, a few years later, following my faith, because that's really all I've got right now. More prayers, more discussions, lots of research later, I decided that the doctorate program was a little more than I was willing to invest in my present state of mind. It didn't seem like the right timing or the right fit for me. My sister recommended looking into the physical therapy assistant degrees and so I did. And yesterday I applied to the certified program in Salt Lake. There have been a lot of bumps in the road, hoops to jump through and ruts to maneuver, but I'm plunging ahead with my faith and my prayers as the guiding force. We shall see where this takes me, but, if everything goes right, I will be back in school sometime later this year.
Nothing is ever easy, especially not the things that are worth it. But we learn and we grow. And when we turn around and look at how far we've come, we wouldn't usually trade the things we've been through, because those trials and obstacles have made us the people that we are today. It is our choice which way we grow- grow to be more faithful and positive or more bitter and pessimistic. God loves us. Each and every one of us. I have never doubted it but I certainly know it now with more surety than I did two years ago. The last year has by no means been an easy one. In some respects it's been one of the hardest so far, but it doesn't change the love that my Lord and Savior have for me, nor I for them. My very life is a witness of God's love and I will gladly share it with anyone who asks.
Well, I think that's everything. Until next year, friends!
Friday, January 22, 2016
Friday, January 23, 2015
Playing Catchup
Ah hey. It's been another... almost year! I don't really have any excuses for not writing. I guess my life kind of went in another direction and blogging about it didn't seem like a thing that I should be doing? I can't really say for sure. Because, as far as my boring life goes, quite a lot of stuff happened.
So... recap:
Summer 2013: I went to South Korea for a couple months. It was an exciting time. There were good and bad times. I learned a lot. I did not come back fluent, but I was competent enough to travel across the country on my own with a friend who spoke the same amount that I did. (Which, in retrospect, was definitely not enough...) Back in Utah, I spent the rest of the summer playing with my sisters and devising my schedule for the coming school year. Which is when I found out how very close to graduation I was. Which freaked me out a little bit. But it was long past due so I figured I would give it my all. However, the closer to the start of semester I got, the more I realized that I wasn't really prepared to graduate. I didn't feel as though I had fulfilled all that I wanted to. I didn't feel accomplished, or prepared to enter the workforce. Man, I didn't even like my major! I had no plan, no notion of what I was going to do after graduation. I didn't even have a hint of an idea as to what kind of job I wanted to get. Buuut... BYU pushed me to graduate. In fact, they wanted me to forget my minor and my language classes; they wanted me to finish in a semester and graduate in December. I pushed real hard for that extra semester...
Fall 2013/Winter 2014: School. My last year. I spent the fall teaching dance in Pleasant Grove and taking something like 16 credits. I was stressed about money- as much as I loved teaching, it was a long drive and not enough hours to really get me through my bills. So I was also looking for a job. Thank goodness for connections! In December, roommate introduced me to Jeff Strong, a fantastic BYU police officer who gave me a job at the Museum of Art on campus. And I took the early shift. Kill me, I was up at 4:30 every morning, but I enjoyed the work and I needed it. My second semester was a race against time. I cared more about my language class than I did about any of my major classes. I was graduating in just a few months and the only thing topping my enormous pile of regrets was the fact that I was terrified of what I was going to do after BYU. I hated myself for the decisions that had led me to where I was academically. But I was graduating and there wasn't much I could do about except try to pass my classes. (Which I did, in case you were wondering.) Some time in March, I got a call from my sister Katie, who lives in Virginia with her husband and daughter. She told me that her nanny couldn't work for them anymore and was wondering if I would like to come to Virginia for the summer to watch my niece. I prayed. I pondered. I was ready to get out of Utah and here was my opportunity. So I jumped.
Summer 2014: Never did I ever think that I would be living in Virginia. But Grace is the sweetest, cutest, most wonderful little one-year old in the world and I am SO LUCKY that I get to spend so much time with her. It was a very different kind of summer, but I enjoyed it. I liked the new atmosphere, meeting new people, attending a tiny branch of singles that was the polar opposite of any BYU ward I'd attended. I miss Utah. I miss my family and friends. I miss the familiarity. I miss the mountains and the church. But I've learned a lot. Not just about the world, but about myself. Things I probably wouldn't have learned if I'd stayed in Utah. I started searching for life options. Go back to school? For what? What did I really want to do? Go back to Utah? Get a job? Move to Korea and teach English? Nothing was really very clear. And it was stressful. Lots of praying and hoping. And faith. Lots and lots of faith. Because I know, regardless of what does or does not happen, that Heavenly Father will guide me.
Fall 2014: Trying to get a better idea of what I wanted to do... found out my sister was having another baby and it was like an answer to a prayer. I needed to stay in Virginia. It wasn't my plan, but I knew it was right. I got a calling in the branch's relief society presidency and another job at Habitat for Humanity in the family services department. Also a lot of new experiences. I never thought I'd be the "crazy Mormon" but at Habitat, I am!
Now: It's 2015 and I'm still no closer to making a discovery about a life path. It's one of my New Year's resolutions though! ;) A chance to go to Korea to teach English with a friend came up. Initially, I was feeling okay about it. I love Korea, in spite of some of the anxiety that comes up whenever I think about it, and I would be with a friend. So I sent in my resume. Which is a pretty big step for me, considering less than a year ago, I was 100% sure that I didn't ever want to teach English. I wasn't feeling great about it still, but I felt that it was probably time to take a leap and Korea would definitely be a leap. Well, it turns out that they wanted us in March. And the more I thought about it, the worse it felt. I am committed to Grace and little sister, to my friends, to my branch, to Norfolk, to this current situation, until they move this summer. And March is only two months away. But I prayed about it. I talked to my sister about it. And even after she gave her blessing and said it would be fine, they would figure it out, I did not feel good about it. Even more so, I didn't want to go. And then I made a sort of realization. I think I've been trying to make other peoples' dreams my own. Someone is really excited about teaching in Korea so it excites me too. Someone else is going to grad school and is feeling very fulfilled, if a little stressed, so I should go to grad school too. Life is comfortable and familiar in Utah so I should definitely go back to living there too. These are all good things, but they aren't necessarily mine. I don't know why it has taken me so long to realize that.
Maybe it's because I've been so desperate for a dream for so long. No one has forced anything on me, I simply want to have purpose. And that brought me to another lightbulb. While watching my niece may not be academically fulfilling, it is wonderful, more wonderful than I deserve. She is a little light in my life and I love her so much. She teaches me more than I teach her, I think. I'm so blessed.
So will I nanny for the rest of my life? Maybe not. But I am pretty happy and I can find ways to be fulfilled aside from saving the world or curing the common cold. I have options and I have my whole life ahead of me. That may be terrifying and overwhelming, but I will take it one day at a time and I am never alone. There is always Someone on my side. And that is a huge comfort and far more than I deserve.
So... recap:
Summer 2013: I went to South Korea for a couple months. It was an exciting time. There were good and bad times. I learned a lot. I did not come back fluent, but I was competent enough to travel across the country on my own with a friend who spoke the same amount that I did. (Which, in retrospect, was definitely not enough...) Back in Utah, I spent the rest of the summer playing with my sisters and devising my schedule for the coming school year. Which is when I found out how very close to graduation I was. Which freaked me out a little bit. But it was long past due so I figured I would give it my all. However, the closer to the start of semester I got, the more I realized that I wasn't really prepared to graduate. I didn't feel as though I had fulfilled all that I wanted to. I didn't feel accomplished, or prepared to enter the workforce. Man, I didn't even like my major! I had no plan, no notion of what I was going to do after graduation. I didn't even have a hint of an idea as to what kind of job I wanted to get. Buuut... BYU pushed me to graduate. In fact, they wanted me to forget my minor and my language classes; they wanted me to finish in a semester and graduate in December. I pushed real hard for that extra semester...
Fall 2013/Winter 2014: School. My last year. I spent the fall teaching dance in Pleasant Grove and taking something like 16 credits. I was stressed about money- as much as I loved teaching, it was a long drive and not enough hours to really get me through my bills. So I was also looking for a job. Thank goodness for connections! In December, roommate introduced me to Jeff Strong, a fantastic BYU police officer who gave me a job at the Museum of Art on campus. And I took the early shift. Kill me, I was up at 4:30 every morning, but I enjoyed the work and I needed it. My second semester was a race against time. I cared more about my language class than I did about any of my major classes. I was graduating in just a few months and the only thing topping my enormous pile of regrets was the fact that I was terrified of what I was going to do after BYU. I hated myself for the decisions that had led me to where I was academically. But I was graduating and there wasn't much I could do about except try to pass my classes. (Which I did, in case you were wondering.) Some time in March, I got a call from my sister Katie, who lives in Virginia with her husband and daughter. She told me that her nanny couldn't work for them anymore and was wondering if I would like to come to Virginia for the summer to watch my niece. I prayed. I pondered. I was ready to get out of Utah and here was my opportunity. So I jumped.
Summer 2014: Never did I ever think that I would be living in Virginia. But Grace is the sweetest, cutest, most wonderful little one-year old in the world and I am SO LUCKY that I get to spend so much time with her. It was a very different kind of summer, but I enjoyed it. I liked the new atmosphere, meeting new people, attending a tiny branch of singles that was the polar opposite of any BYU ward I'd attended. I miss Utah. I miss my family and friends. I miss the familiarity. I miss the mountains and the church. But I've learned a lot. Not just about the world, but about myself. Things I probably wouldn't have learned if I'd stayed in Utah. I started searching for life options. Go back to school? For what? What did I really want to do? Go back to Utah? Get a job? Move to Korea and teach English? Nothing was really very clear. And it was stressful. Lots of praying and hoping. And faith. Lots and lots of faith. Because I know, regardless of what does or does not happen, that Heavenly Father will guide me.
Fall 2014: Trying to get a better idea of what I wanted to do... found out my sister was having another baby and it was like an answer to a prayer. I needed to stay in Virginia. It wasn't my plan, but I knew it was right. I got a calling in the branch's relief society presidency and another job at Habitat for Humanity in the family services department. Also a lot of new experiences. I never thought I'd be the "crazy Mormon" but at Habitat, I am!
Now: It's 2015 and I'm still no closer to making a discovery about a life path. It's one of my New Year's resolutions though! ;) A chance to go to Korea to teach English with a friend came up. Initially, I was feeling okay about it. I love Korea, in spite of some of the anxiety that comes up whenever I think about it, and I would be with a friend. So I sent in my resume. Which is a pretty big step for me, considering less than a year ago, I was 100% sure that I didn't ever want to teach English. I wasn't feeling great about it still, but I felt that it was probably time to take a leap and Korea would definitely be a leap. Well, it turns out that they wanted us in March. And the more I thought about it, the worse it felt. I am committed to Grace and little sister, to my friends, to my branch, to Norfolk, to this current situation, until they move this summer. And March is only two months away. But I prayed about it. I talked to my sister about it. And even after she gave her blessing and said it would be fine, they would figure it out, I did not feel good about it. Even more so, I didn't want to go. And then I made a sort of realization. I think I've been trying to make other peoples' dreams my own. Someone is really excited about teaching in Korea so it excites me too. Someone else is going to grad school and is feeling very fulfilled, if a little stressed, so I should go to grad school too. Life is comfortable and familiar in Utah so I should definitely go back to living there too. These are all good things, but they aren't necessarily mine. I don't know why it has taken me so long to realize that.
Maybe it's because I've been so desperate for a dream for so long. No one has forced anything on me, I simply want to have purpose. And that brought me to another lightbulb. While watching my niece may not be academically fulfilling, it is wonderful, more wonderful than I deserve. She is a little light in my life and I love her so much. She teaches me more than I teach her, I think. I'm so blessed.
So will I nanny for the rest of my life? Maybe not. But I am pretty happy and I can find ways to be fulfilled aside from saving the world or curing the common cold. I have options and I have my whole life ahead of me. That may be terrifying and overwhelming, but I will take it one day at a time and I am never alone. There is always Someone on my side. And that is a huge comfort and far more than I deserve.
Friday, February 7, 2014
So... It's Been... Months
Ah, hey guys!
So...
It's been approximately... less than a year? Yeah...
Brief catchup:
So I was in Korea. For two months. We traveled all over. When I say all over, I mean all over. We started in the capital and moved our way down the east side of the country, all the way to the island off the southern coast. Jeju! And then we made our way back up to Seoul via the west side. It was an incredible two months. I learned so so much both good and bad.
I know that's a lame explanation of two months. One paragraph will never be able to do it justice. But it is what I can do for right now. There are plenty of pictures on Facebook if you're curious. As far as details... when I get some free time, I will try to post in greater length. So...
Life.
Back in school. And: I'm graduating in APRIL!!!!! Woohoo! Yup, it's pretty exciting and I'm looking forward to it, but I'm also scared silly. What on earth am I going to do after I graduate? I can almost hear you answering me: 'get a job, Christina, duh.' Well, yeah. Thanks for that. :) But where? HOW? WHAT? Where do I even start looking? These questions are kind of eating me up inside, even as I try to shove them aside and focus on just making it through my final semester. Which is turning out to be pretty darn tough. Statistics is the bane of my existence. I don't care what anyone says. Sorry. But, I'm taking Zumba and trying desperately to improve my Korean whilst working two jobs and being a good roommate. Hey, I'm still alive. Insert amazing song here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=of2GzuZGxo0. Ahem. Moving on.... :) So yeah. Problem 1: Completing final semester of school without allowing senioritis to drown me. Problem 2: The big massive SCARY void that is post-graduation!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay. Now that I've got that out there.
Erm... that's really all that's going on. I miss old friends, even as I make new friends. I miss old dreams even as I make new ones. I battle myself on my greatest desires even as I attempt to face reality head-on. Aigoo (Korean expression... often invokes exasperation).
뭐 어떻가지? 아이구... 도와 주세요!
읽기 주셔서 감사합니다!!!!
So...
It's been approximately... less than a year? Yeah...
Brief catchup:
So I was in Korea. For two months. We traveled all over. When I say all over, I mean all over. We started in the capital and moved our way down the east side of the country, all the way to the island off the southern coast. Jeju! And then we made our way back up to Seoul via the west side. It was an incredible two months. I learned so so much both good and bad.
I know that's a lame explanation of two months. One paragraph will never be able to do it justice. But it is what I can do for right now. There are plenty of pictures on Facebook if you're curious. As far as details... when I get some free time, I will try to post in greater length. So...
Life.
Back in school. And: I'm graduating in APRIL!!!!! Woohoo! Yup, it's pretty exciting and I'm looking forward to it, but I'm also scared silly. What on earth am I going to do after I graduate? I can almost hear you answering me: 'get a job, Christina, duh.' Well, yeah. Thanks for that. :) But where? HOW? WHAT? Where do I even start looking? These questions are kind of eating me up inside, even as I try to shove them aside and focus on just making it through my final semester. Which is turning out to be pretty darn tough. Statistics is the bane of my existence. I don't care what anyone says. Sorry. But, I'm taking Zumba and trying desperately to improve my Korean whilst working two jobs and being a good roommate. Hey, I'm still alive. Insert amazing song here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=of2GzuZGxo0. Ahem. Moving on.... :) So yeah. Problem 1: Completing final semester of school without allowing senioritis to drown me. Problem 2: The big massive SCARY void that is post-graduation!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay. Now that I've got that out there.
Erm... that's really all that's going on. I miss old friends, even as I make new friends. I miss old dreams even as I make new ones. I battle myself on my greatest desires even as I attempt to face reality head-on. Aigoo (Korean expression... often invokes exasperation).
뭐 어떻가지? 아이구... 도와 주세요!
읽기 주셔서 감사합니다!!!!
Monday, April 22, 2013
The Korea Diaries: Prepping for Korea Part 2
Finals are finally finished! Now is the time for me to start focusing solely on all the things I must do in the next 6 days... Including packing. It's very difficult to decide what I want to take with me that I can't live without for 2 months... And I need to be mobile because we won't be sitting still very much. So I decided to try to cram my life into one suitcase and my backpack. Whatever doesn't fit... I guess I will get there.
There are some things that I don't think I will be able to get there. You may have noticed... Asians don't really have hair like mine. So... naturally, they won't have the stuff to take care of hair like mine. Which adds a bunch of weight and hassle but it's totally necessary. I have adopted a no-stress policy. We shall see how well that works out. :)
Also on my agenda. Speak Korean. I haven't really spoken much Korean since my oral final... LAST FRIDAY. What? That's... over a week! So it's a goal... Speak as much as I can every day. Remember everything that was just flushed out of your brain... Because that happens every semester after finals. My brain takes all of the information it has been holding onto for the past four months, and it dumps it all. Sometimes quite useful... Other times not so much.
There are so many people in my life that I want to say goodbye to that I'm a little bit afraid I'm just not going to get around to... It makes me very sad. This is one of those things that I regret the most... And I hope that you will forgive me. Because I'm sorry. So sorry. Time has simply flown and I have had to let go of a lot of things I wanted to do and so many people I wanted to see. Just know that you are in my thoughts and I love you a lot!
Down to a bit more serious matter. People keep asking if I'm going, what with the scary stuff that is happening over there. Yes. Yes I am still going. Security even contacted the US Embassy there to make sure that it was okay. And all is well. South Korea isn't bothered a bit by what is going on to the north. No, the only people who seem to be making a fuss are us. Which, according to my director, is just what North Korea wants... to boost morale within their borders. So the media is turning it into a big deal and they are getting their reaction. Don't worry; it's all gonna be fine. :)
Another question on your mind: Am I nervous?
Well... I wasn't. For quite a while. And maybe that's just because it hasn't seemed very real since I was still focusing on school. But after our last group meeting, I did get a bit nervous... Mostly because I really don't know much of the language. I know enough to get by... barely. I mean, this is why I am going, to learn the language... But I think that the first week or so is going to be quite interesting. But I won't be alone. And I'm not worried. So don't you worry either. Not that you were.
It's going to be an adventure. I'm lucky enough to have my dear friend Mindy coming along with me so I shall never be lonely. We have plans... Just you wait and see. I will spill the beams on one thing though. We managed to get tickets to see CNBlue in concert in Seoul!!!! Okay, this won't mean much to you, but it sure means A LOT to us. It's pretty epic. More details to come no doubt. So many that I will probably bore you.
This is really all I can think of for now... If you have any packing suggestions, or things I should definitely bring along/not forget... Or any travel advice at all, post it below, I would love to hear your thoughts. :)
There are some things that I don't think I will be able to get there. You may have noticed... Asians don't really have hair like mine. So... naturally, they won't have the stuff to take care of hair like mine. Which adds a bunch of weight and hassle but it's totally necessary. I have adopted a no-stress policy. We shall see how well that works out. :)
Also on my agenda. Speak Korean. I haven't really spoken much Korean since my oral final... LAST FRIDAY. What? That's... over a week! So it's a goal... Speak as much as I can every day. Remember everything that was just flushed out of your brain... Because that happens every semester after finals. My brain takes all of the information it has been holding onto for the past four months, and it dumps it all. Sometimes quite useful... Other times not so much.
There are so many people in my life that I want to say goodbye to that I'm a little bit afraid I'm just not going to get around to... It makes me very sad. This is one of those things that I regret the most... And I hope that you will forgive me. Because I'm sorry. So sorry. Time has simply flown and I have had to let go of a lot of things I wanted to do and so many people I wanted to see. Just know that you are in my thoughts and I love you a lot!
Down to a bit more serious matter. People keep asking if I'm going, what with the scary stuff that is happening over there. Yes. Yes I am still going. Security even contacted the US Embassy there to make sure that it was okay. And all is well. South Korea isn't bothered a bit by what is going on to the north. No, the only people who seem to be making a fuss are us. Which, according to my director, is just what North Korea wants... to boost morale within their borders. So the media is turning it into a big deal and they are getting their reaction. Don't worry; it's all gonna be fine. :)
Another question on your mind: Am I nervous?
Well... I wasn't. For quite a while. And maybe that's just because it hasn't seemed very real since I was still focusing on school. But after our last group meeting, I did get a bit nervous... Mostly because I really don't know much of the language. I know enough to get by... barely. I mean, this is why I am going, to learn the language... But I think that the first week or so is going to be quite interesting. But I won't be alone. And I'm not worried. So don't you worry either. Not that you were.
It's going to be an adventure. I'm lucky enough to have my dear friend Mindy coming along with me so I shall never be lonely. We have plans... Just you wait and see. I will spill the beams on one thing though. We managed to get tickets to see CNBlue in concert in Seoul!!!! Okay, this won't mean much to you, but it sure means A LOT to us. It's pretty epic. More details to come no doubt. So many that I will probably bore you.
This is really all I can think of for now... If you have any packing suggestions, or things I should definitely bring along/not forget... Or any travel advice at all, post it below, I would love to hear your thoughts. :)
Sunday, March 10, 2013
The Korea Diaries: Prepping for Korea Part 1
These days, whenever people ask how I'm doing or what I'm up to, I kind of forget that I'm in school and working... my mind immediately flies to the trip that I'm about to take in approximately 50 days!!!! Most minutes, I'm thinking, "life can't get more exciting than this". Not too long after that, reality kicks in and I recognize that I have to deal with things here before I can go anywhere... Yeah.
Prep classes have started. It took a while to solidify everything-- to be honest, things still don't seem terribly solid, but we're for sure going (my bank account can attest to that) and that is really all that matters to me at this point in time. There are approximately 14 of us going, including Dr. Peterson, the head of this brigade. Apparently he is a master of all things Korea (excepting pop culture, of which he knows... very little). My Korean friends tell me that his Korean is flawless, so that makes me excited to spend some time learning from him, hoping I will pick up some of that awesomeness.
Our schedule is pretty tentative. 5 days in Seoul, then to Andong where we will be staying in a Hanok (translation: traditional housing-- most likely rebuilt or renovated, so we will get the whole sleeping on the floors with the sliding doors and everything!), fourish weeks in Inchae (a town way south, not too far from Busan), and then back to Seoul for the last few days. Somewhere in all of that we will also be going to Thebeck and Gangnam to name a few. (If you start singing Gangnam Style now, I will disown you as a friend-- okay, not really, but seriously don't)
We were given the option of what we wanted to focus on for our studies while we are there. Some of the RMs who have good language skills, will focus more on cultural aspect, or some other kind of research. One kid jokingly suggested doing a research paper on 노래방s ('noraebangs' are karaoke rooms)... that probably won't happen. I am determined to spend the majority of my time on language. That's my biggest reason for going so that is what I will be doing.
Our days are supposed to go somewhat like this:
9 am: "Open the Day" (Dr. Peterson's words-- assuming, breakfast, song, prayer, etc)
9-11: culture class
11: language
12: lunch
1: language again
Sounds exciting, right? Actually, this is like a dream come true. I get to spend every day for two whole months doing nothing but studying language and culture! I have thoughts about learning how to play the gayageum (a Korean stringed instrument) but we will see if that's a possibility. :)
Some warnings from our student facilitator and the missionaries who have already been:
-They have different electrical outlets so we should bring converters... or transformers... Whatever they are called. I plan on bringing Bumblebee. Wouldn't a yellow Camaro that can drive itself and protect me from all the crazies be a perfect thing to take on this trip? Okay. Bad joke.
-Bring your own deodorant, toothpaste and sunscreen. Koreans don't stink or sweat so deodorant isn't sold everywhere and they add sugar to their toothpaste which tastes like chalk... Yum. Sunscreen isn't a necessary item when you aren't white and just waiting to look like a lobster the moment your skin makes contact with the sun's rays. So unfair. I want to be reincarnated with dark skin. Lucky ducks.
-Bring a set of sheets and a pillow... Yeah, that's all there is to say about that.
-Ladies: Buy your pants before you go. Koreans have no shape. If you have big feet (9 and up) you will have a hard time finding shoes there. Lucky my feet are small. :)
Things on the generic packing list:
3-5 pants
6-8 shirts
1-2 casual skirts
1 nice dress
Pajamas
Toiletries
1-2 comfortable shoes
1 dress shoes
Laundry bag
Towel
Batteries
Alarm clock
Umbrella
Small flashlight
With all of that in mind, I have started making lists of things I think I will need. I began the hunt last week with a search for comfortable but cute walking shoes. I ended up with a pair of adorable brown Taos that cost more than I have ever paid for a pair of shoes, but they are really comfortable and should last for a long time. For all your sturdy, walking, nice shoe needs, please visit Modern Shoe on center street in Provo. That is totally the place to go. They are really nice and knowledgeable.
Knowing myself, I want to pack light on the way out so that I will have plenty of room for the way back. Seriously, my sisters are asking me to bring back ramen pans... I can buy shirts and things there. But I'm definitely buying my pants here. Stupid Korean girls that have no shape. Ugh.
The time can't go fast enough. But the more I learn in my language classes, the more I realize how much I don't know. And that makes me nervous. But I'm trying to stay positive and look at what I HAVE learned. And how much I will learn when I get there. So long as I am willing to open my mouth and try. Yeah, I'm totally prepared to sound like an idiot. All the time. It's inevitable.
If you have ever gone out of the country and have any packing/traveling/anything tips for me, please leave a comment and let me know. I'm happy for any and all feedback. :)
Prep classes have started. It took a while to solidify everything-- to be honest, things still don't seem terribly solid, but we're for sure going (my bank account can attest to that) and that is really all that matters to me at this point in time. There are approximately 14 of us going, including Dr. Peterson, the head of this brigade. Apparently he is a master of all things Korea (excepting pop culture, of which he knows... very little). My Korean friends tell me that his Korean is flawless, so that makes me excited to spend some time learning from him, hoping I will pick up some of that awesomeness.
Our schedule is pretty tentative. 5 days in Seoul, then to Andong where we will be staying in a Hanok (translation: traditional housing-- most likely rebuilt or renovated, so we will get the whole sleeping on the floors with the sliding doors and everything!), fourish weeks in Inchae (a town way south, not too far from Busan), and then back to Seoul for the last few days. Somewhere in all of that we will also be going to Thebeck and Gangnam to name a few. (If you start singing Gangnam Style now, I will disown you as a friend-- okay, not really, but seriously don't)
We were given the option of what we wanted to focus on for our studies while we are there. Some of the RMs who have good language skills, will focus more on cultural aspect, or some other kind of research. One kid jokingly suggested doing a research paper on 노래방s ('noraebangs' are karaoke rooms)... that probably won't happen. I am determined to spend the majority of my time on language. That's my biggest reason for going so that is what I will be doing.
Our days are supposed to go somewhat like this:
9 am: "Open the Day" (Dr. Peterson's words-- assuming, breakfast, song, prayer, etc)
9-11: culture class
11: language
12: lunch
1: language again
Sounds exciting, right? Actually, this is like a dream come true. I get to spend every day for two whole months doing nothing but studying language and culture! I have thoughts about learning how to play the gayageum (a Korean stringed instrument) but we will see if that's a possibility. :)
Some warnings from our student facilitator and the missionaries who have already been:
-They have different electrical outlets so we should bring converters... or transformers... Whatever they are called. I plan on bringing Bumblebee. Wouldn't a yellow Camaro that can drive itself and protect me from all the crazies be a perfect thing to take on this trip? Okay. Bad joke.
-Bring your own deodorant, toothpaste and sunscreen. Koreans don't stink or sweat so deodorant isn't sold everywhere and they add sugar to their toothpaste which tastes like chalk... Yum. Sunscreen isn't a necessary item when you aren't white and just waiting to look like a lobster the moment your skin makes contact with the sun's rays. So unfair. I want to be reincarnated with dark skin. Lucky ducks.
-Bring a set of sheets and a pillow... Yeah, that's all there is to say about that.
-Ladies: Buy your pants before you go. Koreans have no shape. If you have big feet (9 and up) you will have a hard time finding shoes there. Lucky my feet are small. :)
Things on the generic packing list:
3-5 pants
6-8 shirts
1-2 casual skirts
1 nice dress
Pajamas
Toiletries
1-2 comfortable shoes
1 dress shoes
Laundry bag
Towel
Batteries
Alarm clock
Umbrella
Small flashlight
With all of that in mind, I have started making lists of things I think I will need. I began the hunt last week with a search for comfortable but cute walking shoes. I ended up with a pair of adorable brown Taos that cost more than I have ever paid for a pair of shoes, but they are really comfortable and should last for a long time. For all your sturdy, walking, nice shoe needs, please visit Modern Shoe on center street in Provo. That is totally the place to go. They are really nice and knowledgeable.
Knowing myself, I want to pack light on the way out so that I will have plenty of room for the way back. Seriously, my sisters are asking me to bring back ramen pans... I can buy shirts and things there. But I'm definitely buying my pants here. Stupid Korean girls that have no shape. Ugh.
The time can't go fast enough. But the more I learn in my language classes, the more I realize how much I don't know. And that makes me nervous. But I'm trying to stay positive and look at what I HAVE learned. And how much I will learn when I get there. So long as I am willing to open my mouth and try. Yeah, I'm totally prepared to sound like an idiot. All the time. It's inevitable.
If you have ever gone out of the country and have any packing/traveling/anything tips for me, please leave a comment and let me know. I'm happy for any and all feedback. :)
Thursday, January 17, 2013
To Be that Person I was always Meant to Be
So let's be honest. In this life, there are haters. It's a sad truth; one would hope that everyone and their dog would be happy and kind and the whole world would be able to dance around in one gigantic circle, holding hands (my apologies to the ones who end up in the northern ocean area...) and that peace would reign and it would be butterflies and rainbows. It sounds amazing, right? It sounds like a little peace of heaven to this culture-studying, people-loving geography major.
But the world isn't like that. And people are angry and hateful. Sometimes it turns into exploding bombs and death, and sometimes it's a little bit closer to home.
I have recently been discovering this subtle kind. It's not so much "hate" as it is putting people down and feeding doubt. It's terrible. And I have been a victim of it as I think everyone has. It's easy to give up when someone tells you rather authoritatively that "that's not possible" or "you can't do that". But let me say something right now. One of my goals of 2013 is to make all the things I thought "not possible" into possible. I'm taking my dreams and turning them into realities. Because:
But the world isn't like that. And people are angry and hateful. Sometimes it turns into exploding bombs and death, and sometimes it's a little bit closer to home.
I have recently been discovering this subtle kind. It's not so much "hate" as it is putting people down and feeding doubt. It's terrible. And I have been a victim of it as I think everyone has. It's easy to give up when someone tells you rather authoritatively that "that's not possible" or "you can't do that". But let me say something right now. One of my goals of 2013 is to make all the things I thought "not possible" into possible. I'm taking my dreams and turning them into realities. Because:
ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!!!!!
It's easy to hear, I know, but not so easy to actually do. But I think we've all heard all of our lives that nothing that is easy is truly going to be worth it. And how absolutely true that is. Sure it's easy to gorge yourself on delightful foods at Christmas time but it's so hard to get those pounds off afterwards. But if it's something that you really want, you find a way to make it happen. If you are a Pinterester, I have an entire board dedicated to inspirational thoughts that, if you are having a terrible day, week, month or year, should give you a little boost if you have need of some boosting. I know I've had that time and still have those kind of days every now and again.
I cannot stress how important it is to me that people fight for their dreams. Maybe because I've given up on so many of mine thinking that it isn't possible, it's not something I can do. And yeah, usually it's because someone told me so. It's so simple giving into doubt and fear because that's our automatic. Give up. It's too hard. But our inner strength comes from fighting. We become our best selves by doing those hard things. And it feels terrible while you're going through it. But one day, all of that pain and anguish will make sense because you've walked through the fiery furnace and come out a shimmering, sparkling, worth-billions, diamond.
This is our purpose. We aren't meant to simply float along in this life. We are meant to do something incredible. Look at the people around you. You can do something each of them can't. And they each can do something you can't. It was meant to be this way and we were meant to learn from it.
It's okay to have hard days, to cry and hate life. What's not okay is if you allow every day to be like that, if you give up, if you lay down and say, "I can't do this anymore." You can do it. You're never alone. Anything good you desire, you can obtain if only you try.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Life at the end of 2012
Maybe because it was the end of the semester and there were other things taking up my time.
Maybe because I've had nothing new to report.
Or maybe it's both.
Now that the semester is over and I have no more homework or finals to stress about for a while, my mind is occupied, probably 99% of the time with what is coming in April. It took quite a bit of effort to get to this point and now I am just ready to be there.
I even bought a tour guide book/good phrases to know/a lot of good things to know book... *ahem* to memorize before I go so I don't look like a dorky tourist when I get there.
But let's be honest, I'm not exactly going to blend in... I think it's the white skin. Or maybe the curls.
Whatever. So I won't blend in, but I'm sure gonna try!
I keep having dreams about getting on a plane that just keeps flying, never landing anywhere. An eternal flight... I guess that could be classified as a nightmare. :)
April will come, I'd just like to skip over the four months between now and then. I imagine that Korea is just going to be one big party. Especially when I listen to this song. :) Ob
Obviously it's not going to be exactly like this... but I can be excited nonetheless. It's my dream and I'm livin' it!
P.s. The irony of this music video is that it is not filmed in Korea. :D But that's what I'm going to be doing in Seoul. The walking down the street and dancing thing. Not the graffiti or singing on stage for a bunch of people. :)
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